Forgive and Forget

What was the Christmas about for you? For me, this Christmas was all about forgiveness! After all the merriment and eating that came with Christmas, I lay in bed thinking before I called it a night. I took the time out to reassess the outgoing year; I took a few days to assess all that had happened in the past year. It is the 29^th of December now and so I have just two days to leave 2012 in 2012.

It has been an eventful year for me, a lot happened in this one year. I had ended a relationship, learned of life changing facts, I had learned that people could not be trusted, I learned that even the people you call friend would collude with their family to hurt you, even when they knew their family were clearly in the wrong and would kill you if you did same to them. But through it all, most importantly, I have learned to forgive and forget.

My mantra has always been, the best revenge for someone that hurt you is forgiveness. The way I saw it when you forgive you free yourself of a burden and spend the energy you would have used to plot a revenge to enjoy life, lets face it, I don’t even have the strength or even the brains required to plot a suitable revenge anyway. They person who has hurt you in turn, is burdened with wondering if you have really forgiven them. That to me is even the perfect revenge, you did no work, the person that hurt you does all the ‘revenging’ for you.

But this year I learnt a very important lesson about forgives. Forgetting!!! The terms forgive and forget are terms that go hand in hand. They are terms that we heard all our lives; at least I had, but never real had to live by. As we all know the forgiving part is the easy bit, it’s in the forgetting bit that we have our biggest challenge.

I had never really been in situations where forgiving or forgetting were a problem, because I had never been seriously hurt, I lived a sheltered life, so there was really no room for that. But this year I have been faced with so many betrayals and I have found my power to forget tested. When I was first faced the challenged with forgetting, I turned to the sermon of a priest that visited my church last year, I cant even remember what he looked like but his words have seen me through a lot this year. His sermon was on forgiving and forgetting, but what stood out to me that day was what he said about forgetting. He said, forgetting didn’t mean that you had forgotten what had been done to you; it meant that when you look back at it you didn’t feel the pain you felt when it happened. These words helped me a lot this year and they made a lot of sense, I had always felt guilty that I was unable to forget what had been done to me.

I have forgiven and forgotten all that was done to me this year, but I have taken from them a lesson. I am a happier person because of the fact that I can look back at what has happened this year, without feeling what I felt at the time it happened. I am a happier person because I can look back and come up with lessons that I have learned without feeling any pain. I am a happier person because I have accepted that my past is a very important part of who I am.

I am a happier person because I have been able to FORGIVE AND FORGET.

Young and In Charge: Susan Kukah

Our very first young person of the week is Susan Kukah, who took the business of buying and selling to a new level. Susan started out selling her mum's wares from her car but today the story is different. Read on and hope her story inspires you.

 

Tell us a little about yourself?

Susan: My name is Susan Florence Iye Kukah and am from Kaduna state! I was born on the 16th day of December. Am d first girl out of 3 girls and am d finest (lol).

What was growing up like?

Susan: Growing up for me was really really hard I must confess considering the fact that my parents didn't have enough but to the glory of God,tins are a lot better than they used to and I bless God for everything.

Tell us a little about your educational background?

Susan: I was born in Zaria. I attended Montessori nursery and primary school in Zaria,proceeded to Jabi primary school Abuja and then our lady of Fatima girls secondary school Kaduna where I obtained my Secondary school leaving certificate and then proceeded to Uniabuja where I studied law.

So what is Esskay mart all about? What does it mean and how did the name come about?

Susan: Esskay mart is basically all about buying and selling! What I basically do is order stuffs for young girls who want to go into serious business from the UK,Malaysia and Dubai! You pay me 50% of the total amount charged, I place your order, you get it in 14 days max. The first letter of my name is S and d surname starts with K so i added Ess and then Kay to it and i got esskay! Thats how d name came about!

How did you get into it?

Susan: I started doing this early this year and business is something I and mum love to d even though she has been into it for long!So what I do is I put everything she sells in my car and go to offices where I have friends and I sell for her. She gives me an opportunity to add say #500 or #1000 on every item sold and that way I was able to gather some money. When I graduated and law school wasn't forth coming I decided to confront my dad for a loan of #100000. My Dad didn't buy the idea but I was determined and with the help of God i got the loan and I was able to order six Indian gowns which cost me about #100000 and I sold them. That was d beginning of Esskay mart! So when my dad realised how serious I was he encouraged me even more and with that i was able to order a lot of boxes from Dubai and sold them to brides who were preparing to get married.

What is your typical day like?

Susan: My typical day in Abuja is all about hustling! If am not home,am in the bank doing one or two transactions, after that am already too exhausted to go out,but once in a while i get to sit out with one or two friends!

What do you love most about you and what you do?

Susan: What I love most about what I do is when I order stuffs and they arrive just in time as promised to a customer and the goods ordered are in perfect Condition, that feeling gives me so much joy and satisfaction.

What are the difficulties involved?

Susan: Difficulties I have faced in this business is having to deal with very bad debtors who make promises to pay when I order their goods and fail to fulfil such a promise,it slows me down. But I must say that I won't let it deter me from focusing on my business.

If you weren't doing this, what would you have been doing?

Susan: Lol! If I wasn't doing this I would be doing this my dear, I've got so much passion for buying and selling. It just keeps you focused and makes you remember that you have a future ahead of you and you also have responsiblities ahead of you!

Have you ever felt like giving up on Esskay mart?

Susan: Yes I have, it was just a few months after I started the business, I had to deal with some very personal stuff and it really tried my patience, I thought about giving up but I decided against it. I thank God I didn't give up.

ho or what inspires you?

Susan: What inspires me the most is the fact that am independent. My Parents have been a source of inspiration to me and i thank God for their lives. I love independent women who don't always have to wait for the men to do everything for them. That is who Susan is!

Considering the level of success you have attained, youths out there would be itching to know how old you are.

Susan: Am not young and am not old. Just 26!

Asides work, what do you do for fun?

Susan: I hang out once in a while,watch movies at the cinema. That is all.

Where do you see yourself and Esskay mart in the next five years.

Susan: In the next five years, I see myself grown and more matured, married with beautiful kids and a proud owner of a big plaza with so many things to buy and sell by the special grace of God, Amen.

Advice to youths that wish to follow in your footsteps.

Susan: There may be set backs, but all you need is Determination and Prayers. Without God you honestly won't make it. Be focused, please don't rob God of his own! Pay your tithe always and leave the rest to him to handle.

Some pictures of Susan's wares

 

Susan can be reached on, BB pin: 2A48F725.

 

Until We Want Change

Until we want change, things would only get worse.
Until we want change, our leaders would continue to get away with their corrupt ways.
Until we want change our children would continue to die in avoidable situations.
Until we want change our situation would not get better.

I saw a picture of four young men that were taken out jungle justice style today. What was their offence? They allegedly stole laptops and phones, allegedly being the key word. How do you tell a mother that her only son was beaten and then burnt to death because he allegedly stole a phone and a laptop? No arrests, no trial, no judgement? Just death because some villagers decided to be judge and jury over his alleged act of robbery.

How do we expect things to change when our mentality lays buried in the Victorian era? If Nigerian is to change and move forward, we must bring our mentality into the 21st century. We must be willing to change as much as we expect from the next person. Change wouldn't  magically happen in our lives.

Until we are willing to change, things would only stay the same.
Until we are willing to change, mothers would continue to cry for sons lost to jungle justice.
Until we are willing to change, we would be stuck in the past.
Until we are willing to change.

Aika, land of my fore-fathers

People keep asking why I want a better Nigeria, I guess it time for everybody to see one of the greatest motivation for me. This is me, this is home, this is Aika Ezeolu in Abala Oshimili, Ndokwa  East, Delta state and this is the plight of all the villages around us The closest a person can get to feeling what you feel about something is for them to see it, and since I cant take you guys there physically I guess a video would do. This video was sent tome by my dad, he had to go to the village barely a week after getting back from the states, without properly resting. He had to go back to the village to ensure the safety of our properties and also to ensure the safety of his people. Growing up, I had always been aware of the fact that the rainy season has never been the greatest friend of my people, we always came home in December to see watermarks of how high the flood had been during the year. Growing up I heard tales of how with each year my grandpa had to build a new house once the rains were over, because the house had been swallowed up by the river. In my whole years on earth the flood has never gotten this high, but from the video you can see the water is getting into the house through the window, it has never been this bad. I have been to the village during the rains just twice, and we were lucky because it never rained while we were there.

I guess you all understand why I am highly motivated for change to come to Nigeria, yes it is very selfish, but I want my people to have a better life than what they are used to. I want the sufferings of my people to stop. My people are hard working people and very successful farmers, you can imagine what the rains have done to their crops, they keep fighting for a better life but they keep getting dragged back.

This is an open call to my Governor, His Excellency Dr. Emmanuel Uduaghan, the Chairman of Ndokwa East LGA, our representatives at the senate, representatives at both the national and state house of assembly, your people are suffering, please come to our aid. 

the video is on youtube and the link to it it:

http://youtu.be/f66ZttmrfeA

My2kobo: Me For Change

My2kobo: Me For Change: I had a dream yesterday night, I slept and I never woke up. I said a prayer the moment i woke up and called my Mom and we prayed together. I...

Me For Change

I had a dream yesterday night, I slept and I never woke up. I said a prayer the moment i woke up and called my Mom and we prayed together. I attended the midday mass, we weren't even up to twenty (lol). That dream scared me.

I had a thought yesterday morning, while the sweetness of a hot shower warmed my body on a cold September day. 'God would not let me die before I achieve what I was put on this earth for' and another thought popped into my head 'well no one lives forever, you have to start working towards what you were put on this earth for Iphie'. And with those thoughts the idea to start ME FOR CHANGE was born.

I had being toying with the idea of starting something that would be the center for the change i envision for Nigeria. I toyed with the names Me for change and change by me, Me for change sounded a lot cooler to me, hehehe. I kept pushing back the need to start a movement for change, I kept saying to myself, 'I would start it in December when I go home, I would start small, with my village being the first point of call'.

My dream was the wake up call I needed, I don't have forever to bring about the change I want to see in Nigeria, but I can start now and start bringing about change, no matter how little. I can bring about the change I want, doesn't matter that I am not in Nigeria at the moment. The most important thing is that I want a change that would shake Nigeria by her roots, I am not the only one that wants such change for Nigeria. I cannot not bring about such change alone and even if I wanted to I don't even know how.

I can keep dreaming about change or I can go out and work for it. The change I seek starts from me, ME FOR CHANGE (M4C). You can keep dreaming of a better Nigeria or you can work for it. Join me and we can change Nigeria one person at a time.
Follow Me for change on twitter-https://twitter.com/meforchange and join the group on facebook-https://www.facebook.com/groups/433831589997052/ or you can send us an email with your suggestions meforchange1@gmail.com

One sunny day.

I sat in my little corner of the world thinking, thinking about everything, from music to food, to fashion to family, to friends that were still around, to friends that were now a memory, to Nigeria and to the sun which had blessed me with its presence that morning. I sat in my little corner of the world, thinking about everything, I sat in my little corner of the world, thinking about Nigeria.

Most of my thoughts lately have been about Nigeria. I think of the greatness Nigeria can achieve, I think of the changes that are coming to Nigeria, I think of this change that I am going to be a big part of. I think of a new Nigeria, I think of a better Nigeria. Each day my thoughts are filled with hope of 'the Nigerian Dream'.

How is this change going to come to Nigeria, how do we achieve this 'Nigerian dream', you ask. My answer is simple, it is a nine letter word, the key to all our problems, EDUCATION. I can see you going 'errmm, what is she on about again'. But yes the key to solving our numerous problems is that simple.


You are wondering how a room, tables and chairs, a blackboard and a teacher can solve our problem right? Well i am not referring to that type of education. What I mean by education is information.It holds the key to solving all of our problems. They people should be informed about the true position of things. They should know effects of their actions or lack of it, the effect of their words or lack of it. They should know that they can get the Nigeria they dream of, they just have to work for it.


I sat in my little corner of the world, not just thinking or dreaming of a better Nigeria. I sat in my little corner of the world, plotting my return to the motherland. I sat in my little corner of the world perfecting my little plan of educating my people back in my village. I sat in my little corner of the world, perfecting my plans for a better Nigeria.